Romans 6:16-23King James Version (KJV)
16 Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness?
17 But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you.
18 Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.
19 I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness.
20 For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness.
21 What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death.
22 But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life.
23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Satan never gives up, or at least some negative energy seems to be overwhelming at times. I am in some financial troubles at the moment, there is light at the end of the tunnel but the tunnel is long and I’m afraid I’m going to run out of steam before I get there.
When these things happen it causes me anxiety. It’s more manageable than the kind of anxiety that I had before I went to prison because at least I know the source, it’s not nebulous, and it’s actionable.
Still though it creates a very great urge to get rid of it and I know how to do that at least very temporary but it’s unhealthy, sinful, wrong, so I don’t want to go there. So I’m trying to find healthy ways to deal with it, aside from the obvious which is to do whatever I can do to try to deal with the source which right now is financial stress.
We all know the wages of sin are death but there are times when it seems like if this is how life has to be then perhaps death is acceptable. I know that’s not a good attitude, I just get so tired of being stressed out. I pray for God to help me find a workable path that is proper but it just doesn’t seem to happen. I know God does things on his own time but that doesn’t help me with things that are externally timed like banks wanting payments.